MY PORNO LIFE

Archive for the ‘My Porno Life’ Category

Neytiri from Avatar

I was watching James Cameron’s interview on Attack of the Show last night and he said that one of his criteria when designing Neytiri for Avatar was that “she had to be BLANK-able”. I don’t know about you but I would BLANK the BLANK out of her! I would stick my BLANK in her BLANK then bust a mad BLANK all up in there creating a whole new hybrid species of BLANK.

Unfortunately I won’t be able to see Avatar tonight because my ass will be flying into MD where everyone is freaking out about the foot of snow we are supposed to be getting tonight. BLANK!

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Look, I know Sarah Palin is a complete idiot but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to have lots of unprotected penis-intercourse with her (“penis-intercourse” is a phrase coined by my buddy Zodiac which he uses lieu of ”sex” and of course I pervert into phrases like “penis-intercourse with her face” etc). Just hearing her say the words “unprotected sex” and “porn” turns me on. She’s like your friend’s hot mom, you know it’s wrong to fantasize about her but you still find yourself in the bathroom rubbing one out whilst said friend is playing Super Empire Strikes Back on the SNES in the living room.

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Happy Halloween from Dors Feline

Dors Feline and her enormous tits makes for a very happy Halloween indeed. We are treated to the busty beauty dressed up as a sexy witch of sorts wrapped up in cob webs and boobs exploding everywhere. I can only imagine the look on the astonished clerk’s face when Dors Feline walked in and asked for a costume that could accommodate her natural 34K knockers. Good job buddy, at least you got her half of a costume.

Click here to see more wicked Halloween hotness from Dors Feline

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Tiffany Preston

I just wanted to give a big shout out to my girl Tiffany Preston for taking the time to make me this sweet pic. If you are a fan of porn girls that will do all sorts of nasty things on camera then she is the chick for you. Be sure to check out all her hot videos where she does everything from girl/girl to getting jizz facials. She’s a true slut and she will thank you for saying that.

Click here to see more of Tiffany Preston

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Marie-Claude Bourbonnais as Frost from Mortal Kombat

[Show as slideshow]

Ok, here’s a little back story on me and my madness: I love Mortal Kombat and especially Sub-Zero. He is up there with Boba Fett, Mad Max and Hicks from Aliens. I love Sub-Zero so much that I even call vibrant-blue (you know, that real neon looking blue that blue Slurpees look like) Sub-Zero-blue (based on his Mortal Kombat 2 color palette). Needless to sat that when Frost was introduced in Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance I fell in love with her instantly and have obsessed over her ever since. So much so that my buddy Scott at SVCreations even made me a sculpture of her for Christmas. At any rate, when I stumbled upon Marie-Claude Bourbonnais and her insanely round boobs dressed up as Frost I almost wet myself…In fact I think I did. Enjoy the pics whilst I clean myself up.

Frost by SVCreations

*Frost Bust by SVCreations
*Cosplay Images by Gil Perron for P&P Image Factory

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Carmen Kees for Watch 4 Beauty

I’m really digging on this set right now. Besides the fact that Carmen Kees is hot as hell and the photography is beautiful I love the fact that it reminds me of a 70′s porno. That really was the golden age of pornography. Movies actually had a plot, the models were natural and…well they actually tried. I think that really sums it up. They tried to make erotica, it wasn’t vulgar and it wasn’t extreme – it was quaint. At least that is my memory of it, watching the old sexplotation films on Cinemax late at night or a friend’s VHS tape he stole from his dad, everything seemed dreamlike. It might have been the diffused glow filters they used or maybe it was the fact that I was watching it at such a young age where beggars couldn’t be choosers that every tit I saw was dreamlike. Trying to find porn was half the fun back then, ya know? It was an adventure and it dominated my life. I would love to go back to that point in my childhood where I haven’t seen women insert whole fists in there asses or women taking multiple cocks in every hole of their body at the same time. Back when the female body was new and every Friday night after midnight I might see something I’d never seen before. Now I’m just jaded.

Click here to take a trip down memory lane

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Hollow Man

I’m watching a little Hollow Man right now. Remember Hollow Man? It came out in the 90′s or something (I really don’t feel like looking it up on IMDB…how’s that for fact checking huh?) and it featured Kevin Bacon as a mad scientist who turned himself invisible so he could go around fondling women whilst they sleep. That pretty much sums up the whole movie. But seriously, what would you do if you could turn invisible? You know what you would do and don’t try to deny it cause I’m like the Santa Claus of porn (he know’s what you jerk off to)…You would do exacly what pervo Bacon did, you’d root the corpse. Bam!

Kim Dickens in Hollow Man

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Shock Absorber Sports Bra

Who would have thought that a sports bra company would have hot interactive animated tits on it? I sure as hell didn’t. You can adjust the boob size and the camera angle plus be sure to turn on “show wireframe” for extra fun.  Click on the pic or the link below and have yourself a blast!

http://www.shockabsorber.co.uk/bounceometer/shock.html

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Joanna Angel

Joanna Angel will featured on G4TV all weekend long as a part of their Quake Con coverage. As you know, G4 is a TV channel geared towards video gamers and tech junkies so Joanna Angel is a good fit as a good portion of their demographic also enjoys tattooed alternative solo girls. Come for the video games and stay for the hotness only on G4TV…and my blog

Click here to see pics too hot for TV

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Miss Bella Bellini

Here we have Miss Bella Bellini lifting up her ballerina dress and showing off her perfectly shaved snatch (undoubtedly photoshoped albeit very convincingly). I’m torn though; On one hand I know it’s retouched, but on the other hand I want to accept the fantasy at face value. To retouch or not to retouch? That is the question that all of us working in porn ask ourselves. Do people want to see real or fantasy? I prefer the later since porn by it’s very nature is fantastic (no pizza delivery guy in the history of pizza delivery has ever been invited to have sex with a customer upon arrival) but some people want to see realism (ass zits and all) because it allows them to easily insert themselves into the scenario at hand. As a webmaster I guess it all goes back to the phrase “you can’t please everyone all of the time” and you should always err on the side of what you think is hot because what’s the point of being in porn if you have to look at content all day that doesn’t turn you on.

Click here to decide for yourself if Bella Bellini is retouched or not

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