MY PORNO LIFE

Archive for the ‘Awkward Porn’ Category

Sofie for Met-Art

Here’s a perfect example of a pose that probably worked better on paper than it did in execution. I’m sure the photographer was talking to Sofie and found out that she studies ballet and can do all sorts of ballerina poses. Of course he thought “Ballerinas are hot, Sofie is hot, the location is hot – why not have her do some poses on this log”. See a log isn’t a gym and there is a reason you don’t see models pose like this for nude shoots. Awkward.

Click here to see non-awkward pics of Sofie for Met-Art

Awkward Porn: Some people shouldn't be photographed...ever

I do not subscribe to the belief that all people are beautiful in their own way. I think there are hot people and there are ugly people and I should not be made to look at ugly people. Take this lady for example – she should never (and I really mean never ever in a million fucking years) be in front of a camera in any state of dress or undress. The fact that the webmaster thought she was acceptable for the website is appalling. BTW is it just me or does she look like Jabba The Hutt? Seriously, I’m not making a fat joke or anything I think she has a slight case of “Jabba face”.

Click here to see more pics if you dare

Awkward Porn - Silvie for Hegre-Art

I know some people have a thing for hairy vagina’s, not me though, but that’s not why this pic is in Awkward Porn. When a girl spreads her legs apart like she is ready for her physical and smiles slyly it puts me on edge, like it’s a trap or something. I’m just waiting for her to start peeing the moment I put my face down there like one of those stupid fake flower lapel gags the Joker is always using – hopefully she doesn’t actually pee acid though.

Click here to see Silvie for Hegre-Art

Awkward Porn: I knight thee Retard Face

This chick has, hands down the most unattractive facial expression ever captured on film. To add insult to injury I am not sure why the dude is tapping her tit with his penis. I can only assume he is knighting her with it. Ergo the title of the post “I knight thee Retard Face”. Late.

Click here to see Ally Ann get knighted by some dude’s dick

Awkward Porn - Shock and awe

Is Zarina horrified? Is she shocked? Did she just receive “the shocker”? That’s not sexy. What in the world could possibly have made the webmaster think this was an acceptable picture to keep? So many questions, so few answers…. ….interest… …fading………

Click here to see Zarina’s Surprise

Awkward Porn: Sunrise Surprise

Candid pics and funny outtakes are always a welcome change of pace when promoting an adult website – except when they are obviously not candid and instead are stiff and awkward like this one is. Come on Martina, you can do a better job of faking a surprise. Go practice a few times in front of the mirror and come back to me when you can actually emote something other than “I’m a hot naked girl”.

Click here to see Martina for MPL Studios

Awkward Porn: Excuse me, I'd like to ASS you a few questions

Sadly enough I come across way too many photos of hot girls in unfortunate poses while scouring the interwebs for porn. One day it occured to me – why don’t I start an “Awkward Porn” category and give these hidden gems the spotlight they deserve? Well here it is – Awkward Porn presented by My Porno Life.

The “bend over and spread your ass open” pose is never classy but for some reason it seems to be a recurring theme. The whole point of doing a girl from behind is so I don’t have to look her in the eyes! Of course the idea is that she is ready for insertion, and that’s hot, but I can’t shake the feeling that Priscilla will start doing a “talking butt hole” impersonation from Ace Ventura any minute.

Click here to see Priscilla bent over for Met-Art